Sunday, August 31, 2008

Sleazy "Help the vets?" scam in front of Walmart.

I had to drop into Walmart about 30 minutes ago for a few items. At both doors were two men, each about 50 - one white, one black - running a "Help the vets?" scam. How do I know? Walmart is constantly allowing scam artists - who travel around the country in crews in large vans - to beg at their front doors. NEVER does Walmart appear to check these people out. These two pieces of human garbage each had a little TV dinner type stand; a folding chair; a semi-lunate, cheap piece of red, white and blue dime store, paper bunting on the table, an old institutional pickle jar for donations; and a bogus placard taped to the jar claiming that they represent some noble cause for veterans. Pure, 100%, unadulterated fraud! The white guy looks like he just stepped off of a used car lot. Long, slicked back, greasy looking silver-gray hair. Appears perfectly healthy - or as healthy as old, dissolute, smoking, boozers his age usually look. Now get this: they are both playing dress-up GI. They are wearing some cheap, unauthentic, desert cammie knockoffs from either a catalogue or a very cheesy Army-Navy store. What is hysterical is that the cammie pants are not only brand new, but they've never been worn or washed before. You can still see all of the original folds where they just took them out of the plastic bags and donned them this weekend. On top of that, they are both wearing brand new, gingerbread brown tee-shirts that are clearly cheap, off-color imitations of the real thing. But the piece de resistance has to be the cammie hat that the black guy is wearing. It is made of the same bogus matrerial as the pants. But here's the funny part: it bears no resemblance to any soft cover ever worn by any U.S. armed forces. It's a damned children's beannie, a la "The Beaver." I know that many of our St. Marys cops are veterans. I wish one or two would swoop down on those varmits and charge 'em with bunko.

Oh, yeah. They've also bought some really cheap black work boots they're trying to pass off as combat boots. Desert combat boots are not black, dumbasses!

Car pooling? FYI.

I just got my online policy documents for my auto insurance renewal from GEICO. Not that it applies to me, but I found this interesting language in their page of policy changes. "Coverage is excluded for bodily injury sustained by the occupant of an owned auto used to carry persons or property for compensation or a fee. However, a vehicle used in an ordinary car pool or ride sharing or cost sharing basis is covered." My guess is that such language is common in auto policies, but if you are car pooling, it might not be a bad idea to make sure your policy has such language making an exception from exclusion for car pooling / ride sharing.

Excuse me, but what color IS a watermelon seed?

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,414042,00.html

Savannah's historic terra cotta lion fountain shattered in bizarre auto accident.

Sunday Funnies; Volume 27

The Lie Clock A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, 'What are all those clocks?' St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.' 'Oh,' said the man, 'whose clock is that?' 'That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.' 'Incredible,' said the man'. And whose clock is that one?' St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life.' 'Where's Barack Obama's clock?' asked the man. 'Obama's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Talk about your customer service!

Just a little while ago, I was sitting here at my keyboard getting some on-line home owner's insurance quotes. The very first company I queried was Liberty Mutual. I dutifully filled in all of the requested info on like three or four pages. I got a quote and printed it. Not five minutes later, a guy with a heavy Hispanic accent (whom I'm sure was calculatingly assigned to call Senor Moreno) called me on the phone. It seems that as luck would have it, if I had the time, they just happened to have a licensed agent on hand who could speak to me about a policy. I told the guy that they have not yet poured my foundation; that my anticipated closing was not until December 1st. No matter: they would be happy to talk to me now. I figured, what to hell, I could go on typing while talking to the guy the first guy was going to transfer me to. So, I'm sitting there typing in another request for a quote while I'm holding for the transfer. A few minutes later, the first guy comes back on and tells me that the second guy is with another customer, but is most anxious to talk with me, if I just have the time to hold another couple of minutes. Still typing away, I agreed. Five minutes later, the second guy, also with a Hispanic name and heavy accent, comes on the line. After all of the usual disingenuous pseudo-pleasantries of such a call, he cheerily informs me that he sees on his computer that I live in a coastal area in which his company no longer writes homeowner policies. Now that's service!

McCain picks 44 y/o female governor of Alaska as VP running mate.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Oh, yeah...

the Fernandina-St. Marys water taxi started running today.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Today's St. Marys budget hearing.

Click on image to enlarge.
I just got back from eating out, after attending this afternoon's workshop. It ran from 4:11 PM to 6:00 PM. It was surprisingly well attended - standing room only. To be sure, there were a lot of city employees and the usual Downtown Merchants' mouthpieces, but a lot of other interested citizens as well. I'm fairly certain that the meeting was recorded. It might well be on the city website tomorrow or Friday.
There was a handout which I apparently missed on my way in. Thanks to Mayor Rowland Eskridge for kindly giving me his copy after the meeting.
There are two pages, which I will scan in in a moment. I'm not sure in which order they'll appear so I'm talking first about the one that reads at the top "Current millage rate of 5.6 and not terminating any current employees but deleting 18 positions." This is a list of possible cuts compiled by Bill Shanahan and Max Tinsley. Not that where ever there are references to personnel reductions, they are talking about not filling currently authorized but as yet vacant positions and not firing anyone. At least that is what they said at first. But, if memory serves me, the fire chief clarified that it would, in fact entail firing three full time and three part time firemen.
Needless to say, before the meeting was over, all on council had pandered to the employees and swore that they would not fire anyone. There was also a proposal to cancel the practice of allowing city employees to sell back leave time. One councilman (I forget who) immediately jumped on the opportunity to secure a few votes by expressing sheer horror at the idea, especially given that city employees routinely depended upon that money to buy Christmas presents. Needless to say, that is not going to happen, but they promised to look at the policy very carefully in the future. Sure.
At the very bottom of that first page, where it says "Total" $1,560,712.00 savings of fund balance," it means that if they kept the millage rate at the current 5.6 (i.e., no rollback to pre- re-assessment levels of revenue) and made every one of the cuts enumerated, they would have to pull $1,560,712.00 LESS out of the contingency fund (CORRECTION: out of the "fund balance," i.e., the total of all unexpended funds plus interest from previous budgets. Nice catch, Sandy.), but still would not fully cover the nut for the upcoming budget.
Page two starts off with the heading "Additional savings through department reorganizations or re classifications." You can see the proposed savings.
Now, look right about in the middle where it talks about millage rates. Assuming that all of the cuts on pages one and two were to be enacted and the millage rate was rolled back to 5.1 (to generate exactly the same revenue as last year) the cut savings of $1,251,315.00 plus the loss of 7,977.00 in tax revenues = savings to fund balance of $1,243.338.00
If they stick with the current millage rate of 5.6 (no rollback) the savings of $1,251,315.00 plus increased tax revenues (from higher assessed values) = a savings to the fund balance of $1,556,712.00
If they raise the millage rate to 6.1 (note that Kingsland's is 8), the $1,251,315.00 in savings plus the 626,770.00 in increased revenues = savings to the fund balance of $1,878,085.00
Finally, you see the annual and monthly tax bill differences on homes of different values at the different millage rates.
Here is what you will end up with: Look at this line.
"Raise millage to 6.1 = $1,251,315 + 626,770 =$1, 878,085.00."
When the final vote is taken, there will be an increase to a new millage rate of 6.1. The second number - the proposed savings of $1,251,315.00 - will be considerably lower. The revenue will be as stated. The final number - the "savings of fund balance -will of course be lower as well.
The politically courageous thing to do would be to terminate a lot of upper level assistants who were hired in anticipation of a boom that did not happen. That being said, the best we can hope for is the increase to 6.1 mills; a hiring freeze; and natural attrition of the employee force.
P.S.,
There will be one last budget workshop with public input. It will be held from 4:00 PM to 6:00 PM on Monday, September 8th, followed immediately by the regularly scheduled city council meeting at which the budget will be voted upon.

Tough times for all - the huge and the small!

This just in from a highly reliable source, well known to me, who prefers to remain anonymous. "I got information that the bankruptcy trustee has advised that Land Mar is in default. They have not been making the purchase payments as agreed. The clean up is continuing but it is not known for how long. The Court wants as much of that completed as soon as possible because that has to be done before there can be an development. Land Mar was split off with some other company, but I can't recall the name. It was reported by the Florida Times Union. With a little research you could turn that up. I find this to be a major development for the area. It is just a sign of the times. Also. St. Marys Steak and Seafood is closed and I was told Choo Choo is going the same route. This is just the beginning. There was an opening at the D.A.'s office for a receptionist job and they had 50+ applicants where there are usually just a few. It is a lot worst out there than many realize. Tough times for certain."

Straight from the highly effective horse's mouth.

Last week, a reader commented to the effect that not unlike the City of St. Marys, the number of employees of Camden County had also exploded in the last couple of years in anticipation of rapid and extensive growth which has not come to fruition. I sent Mr. Steve Howard, our county administrator, an e-mail (published here) requesting that he set the record straight. Here is his response, received about 2 hours ago. Thank you, Steve. Well done - as usual. Keep up the good work! Jay Moreno: Thank you for the opportunity to respond to your inquiry. In January 2004, there were 322 employees working for Camden County Government. Currently, there are 394 employees, which is slightly over a 22% increase (Source: Department of Finance & Budget, BOCC), majority as a result of new employees in the area of Public Safety: Sheriff's office and EMS. In August 2007, which was when I began my tenure with Camden County as County Administrator, I evaluated the overall effectiveness of the organization. Recommendations were made based upon my observations and the variety of input received from the Board of Commissioners, Department Directors, and employees. At that time, twelve (12) departments reported directly to the County Administrator. My plan was to consolidate these departments and reduce them to only six (6) departments. This initiative, if approved at the time of my planning, would allow synergy among the departments, streamline processes, establish a unified command structure, and ensure consistency of policy application. Going ahead with the reorganization process would help me to remain true to my mission which is to deliver efficient and effective services to the citizens of Camden County. The following positions were requested and approved within the FY 2008 budget as a result of my reorganization plan (Phase 1): · Upon my hire, I discovered there was no current position that solely provided clerical assistance for the County Administrator's office. I reclassified an unfilled/vacant position of Records Retention Coordinator to Administrative Assistant to County Administrator. This position assists the County Administrator in disseminating directives, preparing required reports, assisting in budget preparation, obtaining, organizing and drafting administrative material for public information or office use. This position serves as a liaison between County employees, department managers, elected County officials, general public and the County Administrator in the day-to-day operation of County business. This position coordinates the County Administrator's calendar and appointments. · I reclassified a previously allocated position of Executive Assistant to County Clerk. This position is responsible for maintaining the official records of Camden County. This position collects, places, prepares, and schedules agenda items for official meetings and distributes accordingly. This position attends all regular, special and called meetings of the Board of Commissioners, ensures the setup of the facility, and records, transcribes, and distributes the minutes of these meetings accordingly. This position is also responsible for the operation of Records Retention Management and adherence to all applicable Georgia laws in accordance to records management. This position is also responsible for answering all Open Records Requests in accordance to Georgia's Open Records Act. · I created a new office and position of Director of Strategic Planning. This position is responsible for developing and facilitating the strategic planning process and coordinating key strategic projects. This position manages legislative issues, grant research, and acts as a liaison for community affairs. To date, with this position, we have been able to apply for $553,000 in grants. This is a proactive approach to government by linking funding requests to our strategic plan and ensuring that Camden County's priorities are made aware of in Atlanta and Washington. Since Camden County was not a Local Issuing Authority, the County missed out on $1.3 million dollars in land disturbance fees because $80 per disturbed acre went to the State. In order to comply with the State of Georgia Erosion and Sedimentation Act of 1975, Camden County was certified and approved as a Local Issuing Authority by the State of Georgia (EPD) and Board of Commissioners in October of 2007. Now the County receives $40 per acre for all projects over 1 disturbed acre. State law requires that all Local Issuing Authorities have at least 1 full time inspector for erosion & sedimentation control; therefore, the position of Erosion and Sedimentation Control Investigator was created. Since then, the County has brought in $47,286.80 in land disturbance fees which will subsidize the cost of this position and remain budget neutral. Now, all land disturbance plans and applications are submitted to Planning & Development. Before they went to the State and the County never know about it until the project began. This gives the County control of permitting and the knowledge of what is going on before it happens. Local citizens, contractors, and developers have one (1) point of contact, which is Camden County, before they would deal with State departments. This position has already dedicated over 1,000 hours to E&S Control, conducted over 408 site inspections, investigated over 105 complaints, issued over 100 Notice to Comply violations (verbal and written), and issued over 30 Stop Work orders (verbal and written). On site instruction and education in Erosion and Sedimentation Control, installation and maintenance are also given. Since October 2007, this position has hosted a Level 1-B certification class for Erosion & Sedimentation Control. This class consisted of 12 contractors, county and city workers. Currently the Erosion and Sedimentation Control Investigator also volunteers a collateral duty of Deputy EMA Director in the event of an emergency when our Emergency Operations Center (EOC) is active. The Department of Public Safety was consolidated to include divisions of Fire Rescue, EMA, and Animal Control. The Department of Public Works was consolidated to include the divisions of Roads & Bridges and Mosquito Control. The Department of Support Services was created to consolidate divisions of Human Resources, Risk Management, Information Technology, and Facilities Management. The Human Resources Director position was reclassified to be the position of Support Services Director. The following positions were requested and approved within the FY 2009 budget as a result of my reorganization plan (Phase 2): · The pursuit of the goals of efficiency, effectiveness and enhanced accountability require and merit an investment of resources. The position of Management Analyst has recently been created and filled to identify areas where process redesign/improvement can significantly impact efficiency, quality, customer service and cost avoidance within the organization. This position provides analysis, conducts research and uncovers new approaches to new challenges and long standing problems. This position works with the Finance Department for implementation of budgeting for results and outcomes. This position also works closely with the Suggestions To Assist in Reduced Spending (STARS) program, which is a new employee suggestion program that will reward employees to who submit suggestions that enhance productivity, cut costs or improve the operations of County government. To date, the Management Analyst has achieved $150,000 in cost avoidance. · The County is comprised of over 600 square miles, thus presenting a challenge when trying to spray for mosquitoes. In order to increase the number of hours Camden County is being sprayed each month for mosquitoes, a part-time Vector Control Technician was hired. This position is responsible for operating vehicles and equipment to control mosquitoes in the County. The Mosquito Control Division will now be able to spray the County from 8 p.m. to 9 a.m. Monday through Friday, which helps us to better serve the community and increases the quality of life and public health. · Certain functions and services are more compatible for consolidation in an effort to maximize impact, provide higher degree of focus, and enhance effectiveness. My plan was to create the position of a County Engineer that will serve as a technical advisor on public work projects included but not limited to roads, storm water management, construction management, and/or future water/waste water planning initiatives. Capital construction projects will be managed by this office. The division of Facilities Management will be transferred and supervised by the County Engineer. During my tenure as County Administrator, in all offices of the Board of County Commissioners and Constitutionals, there has been a net increase of three (3) new positions. The proposed reorganizations should not be considered a final product, but the phases of an ongoing evolution. I am committed to guiding Camden County Government in becoming a High-Performance Organization. We will continue to focus on an organization wide culture change through leadership, vision, values, and system improvements.To the taxpayer we must commit our best effort. Nothing less is acceptable. Should you have any further questions, please do not hesitate to contact me. Sincerely, Steve L. Howard, CPM, CPPO County Administrator From: Jay Moreno [mailto:jaymor@tds.net] Sent: Thursday, August 21, 2008 12:28 PM To: Steve Howard Subject: Purported dramatic increase in the number of county employees Dear. Mr. Howard, As you may know, I maintain a blog called "Camden Commentary." http://camdencommentary.blogspot.com/ After yesterday's opinion piece in the Tribune & Georgian, detailing a 53% increase in employees of the City of St. Marys since 2004 in anticipation of meteoric growth which never came, I posted a comment and a link to that article on my blog. Several readers have subsequently posted comments to the effect that the same thing has happened at the county level. I replied that I was not aware of any substantial increases in the number of county employees, but would make inquires. So that I might pass accurate information on to my readers, I would appreciate your telling me how many employees there were on, say, January 1, 2004, versus how many there are now. Moreover, if there is a net increase, how many of those represent the filling of previously unfilled positions, versus positions newly created since January 1, 2004. I'm sure readers would be most interested to know of any new positions or increase in numbers of old positions since you came on board. You brief explanation of what precipitated the need for any such new employees would also be appreciated. Don't worry about 3 days - just get it to me when you or Jodi find the time. Thank you in advance. Sincerely, Jay Moreno

St. Marys budget workshop today..

at 4:00 PM, in council chambers. Open to the public.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Stand by, St. Marys taxpayers....

the "inevitable" tax hike Kabuki dance of the city council has begun. I just got back a little while ago from tonight's St. Marys City Council meeting. On Wednesday, August 20th, I posted this: In what private enterprise universe.. does a service organization increase its labor force by 53 percent in ANTICIPATION of a demand curve shift to the right, then compound the blunder by keeping the excess workers on when the shift fails to materialize?http://www.tribune-georgian.com/articles/2008/08/20/opinion/1opinion8.20.txt At some point, I opined that the list of proposed draconian cuts in service and possible layoffs might just be a trial balloon on the part of council to see if there would be a sufficient public hue and cry to provide political cover for a tax increase. Well - no surprise to me - that is exactly what happened at tonight's meeting. Keep checking the city web site for the tape of the meeting. I'm not sure how long they take to put them up. Or, you can watch it Thursday night on T.V Camden. There will be an "emergency" budget conference this Wednesday to make the gut wrenching choices. I'll save you the suspense: there will be a millage rate increase. Trust me. 08/26 P.S., That budget workshop will be tomorrow at 4:00 PM in city council chambers. Also, they went into executive session last night on a "real estate matter." I left at that point. Did anyone stick around long enough to learn what that was about? Update: 8/26 @ 1206 HRS. The video of last night's council meeting is now availablefor viewing on the city's website: http://www.ci.st-marys.ga.us/video/video.htm

What did y'all find interesting?

Now that all save one (water taxi) of my current polls are closed, what, if anything, did y'all find interesting and /or surpising in the data?

Yes, sheriff, yes, commissioner - it really is a crime!

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,409621,00.html

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Sunday Funnies; Volume 26

The Darwin Awards salute the improvement of the human genome by honouring Those who accidentally remove themselves from it (or almost!)... Without further ado here are the 2008 Darwin Awards. Eighth Place In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water After squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve His car keys. Seventh Place A 49-year-old San Francisco o stockbroker, who 'totally zoned when he Ran,' accidentally jogged off a 100-foot high cliff on his daily run. Sixth Place While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8 foot hole for protection From the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom when it Collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach used Their hands and shovels trying to get him out but could not reach him. It Took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital. Fifth Place Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the ceiling of a Bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long Flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free rammed into The base of his skull as he hit the floor. Fourth Place Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed as he won a bet with friends who Said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth And pull the trigger. Third Place After stepping around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door, a man walked into H&J Leather & Firearms intent on robbing the store. The Shop was full of customers and a uniformed officer was standing at the Counter. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up And fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The officer and a clerk Promptly returned fire, and several customers also drew their guns and Fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime Scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The Subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified Rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was hurt. (I think this is One of those “Only in America” ones) HONOURABLE MENTION Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored just driving around at 2 A.M. So they lit a quarter stick of dynamite to toss out the window to see What would happen. Apparently they failed to notice the window was closed. RUNNER UP Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said They knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local bridge in the middle Of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped Along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon arrival at the midpoint Of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a Coil of lineman's cable lay nearby. They secured one end around Bingham's Leg and then tied the other to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before The cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle.. He miraculously Survived his fall into the icy water and was rescued by two nearby Fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located. AND THE WINNER IS... Zookeeper, Friedrich Riesfeldt (Paderborn, Germany), fed his constipated Elephant 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, Figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally got relief. Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the Ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded. The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground where he struck his head on a rock as the elephant Continued to evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top of him. It seems to be just one of those freak accidents that proves... 'sh!t Happens''s IT ALWAYS SEEMS IMPORTANT TO THANK THESE PEOPLE FOR REMOVING THEMSELVES FROM THE GENE POOL

Friday, August 22, 2008

I'll be out of town..

on business for the next 40 hours or so. I'll post your comments and respond to e-mails as soon as I get back.

Fay! Enough, already!

http://www.news4jax.com/news4georgia/17194280/detail.html http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/082208/geo_321591169.shtml

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Fay's predicted track as of 2000 HRS today, 8/21.

Fay's predicted track as of 1400 HRS today, 8/21.

Fear of fickle Fay fading fast.

Camden County Emergency Management Agency Situational Report Tropical Storm Fay TS-F9 Public Information Phone Number 912-576-3796 Please Do No Call 911 except for Actual Emergencies County Schools will be closed Thursday August 21, 2008. The decision as to whether to hold school on Friday will be decided sometime tomorrow Camden County offices will be closed Thursday. City of Kingsland offices will be closed Thursday and Friday. City of St. Mary’s offices will be open tomorrow. Camden County Public Health Departments will be closed tomorrow. THERE ARE NO EVACUATIONS ORDERS FOR CAMDEN COUNTY. Residents in low-lying or flood prone areas should closely monitor storm conditions and be ready to move to higher, inland areas if necessary. http://www.news4jax.com/news4georgia/index.html

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Camden EMA Tropical Storm Fay Advisories.

CAMDEN COUNTY EMERGENCY MANAGEMENT AGENCY EVENT: Tropical Storm Fay SITUATION REPORT, TS-F8 All information contained in the report is based on the CURRENT forecast. Tropical Weather Discussion Issued: Wednesday, August 20, 2008 540 am EDT Tropical Storm Fay has turned slowly northward after finally reaching the east-central Florida coast early this morning. The center, however, remains just inland along the coast north of Melbourne and in fact may not emerge over the Atlantic until this afternoon when Fay is expected to move north of the Cape Canaveral area. Most of the global models are now indicating a tighter turn to the northwest and then a sharper westward jog across North Florida after late Thursday and into the northeastern Gulf of Mexico by Friday night or Saturday. In fact, the GFS and European models forecast that Fay will track across the northern part of the Gulf of Mexico this weekend and possibly come ashore early next week. The GFDL and HWRF models are exceptions to this scenario and keep Fay moving northwestward across Georgia and Alabama, but even those models are no longer taking Fay east of 80 West Longitude. So, at this point it appears that Fay will track north or north-northeast paralleling the east coast of Florida near Cape Canaveral today and then turn northwestward and come ashore near Daytona Beach late tonight. On Thursday into Friday morning, it is possible that Fay could track westward across northern Florida between Orlando and Gainesville and possibly emerge into the northeastern Gulf of Mexico Friday afternoon or Friday night. It is still possible that Fay could reach hurricane strength today, however, it seems more likely that the storm will remain a moderate to strong tropical storm as it moves north or north-northeastward along the coast and is not expected to move more than 30 miles offshore today into tonight. The GFDL and HWRF are also no longer forecasting Fay to reach hurricane strength. Fay has maintained good convective banding features and is located in a region of good upper-level outflow, so some strengthening is possible today into tonight and it is expected that Fay will come ashore as a 70 mph tropical - 2 - storm late tonight, although like I just said Fay could reach hurricane strength before landfall. Once ashore, Fay's intensity will large hinge on the track it takes into Florida. If Fay moves further inland over Florida and into the interior southeast United States, then Fay will likely decay into a tropical low. However, if Fay does track into the northern Gulf of Mexico, like the GFS and European models are forecasting, then Fay could restrengthen this weekend. PROCLAMATIONS/DECLARATIONS: None at this time. POTENTIAL EFFECTS TO CAMDEN COUNTY: Tropical Storm Fay is still expected to be a heavy rain maker for Southeast Georgia. The possibility for sustained winds greater than 40 mph remain in effect across most of our county for Thursday and into Friday morning. RECOMMENDED LOCAL ACTIONS: Based on current advisory, Camden County does not expect Hurricane force winds or significant storm surge. If conditions remain the same, no evacuations are expected. Camden County residents should review their hurricane plans, stock their hurricane supplies and monitor the progress of the storm. Periodical updates will be provided as long as the threat of tropical weather exist. To monitor the progress of the storm between updates, please check the National Hurricane Center website at http:/www.nhc.noaa.gov/ or call the Emergency Management office at 912-729-5602 http://www.nhc.noaa.gov/

Closings.

Board of County Commissioners 200 East 4th Street / P.O. Box 99 • Woodbine, GA 31569 Phone: (912) 576.6682 • Fax: (912) 576.5647 • www.co.camden.ga.us Office of the County Administrator “Leadership that Listens” STEVE L. HOWARD O. BRENT GREEN County Administrator County Attorney PRESTON RHODES – Chair KATHERINE NISI ZELL – Vice Chair STEPHEN L. BERRY Commissioner, District 1 Commissioner, District 2 Commissioner, District 3 CHARLENE SEARS DAVID L. RAINER Commissioner, District 4 Commissioner, District 5 Press Release Contact: Steve Howard Phone: 912-510-0464 FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE 3 p.m. EDT, August 20, 2008 Camden County Office Closure Woodbine, GA – August 20, 2008: The Camden County Board of County Commissioners has directed all County offices be closed on Thursday, August 21, 2008 due to the forecast of Tropical Storm Fay impacting our area. Camden County will continue staffing on an essential personnel basis only until deemed safe for all personnel to return to resume regular work schedules. We encourage all citizens to stay updated via the local media outlets. To receive emails on local weather alerts, citizens may visit Camden County’s website at www.co.camden.ga.us, click on Notify Me, and register for the Hazardous Weather Notifications. -End Schools closed tomorrow. Media Release Re: Tropical Storm Fay Date: August 20, 2008 - 1:30 pm Tropical Storm Fay, has diminished in intensity but continues to be a concern due to the possibility ofstrong winds and significant rainfall. The National Weather Service has provided information regarding the intensity of winds that will affect our area during the day on Thursday that presents a cause for concern. Although the storm has been significantly downgraded, its swath extends out about 115 miles and even with a very southern track, could affect Camden County. Information provided by the National Weather Service suggests we will experience sustained winds of up to 40 mph in the inland portions of our county and as high as 50 mph near the coast. These predictions, as well as the expectations of even stronger wind gusts, are a significant threat to school buses on open highways and especially on bridges. While we anticipate the morning and most of the school day will be less severe, transporting students home after school on Thursday may present a real danger. In addition to our concerns with high winds, there is also a higher than normal chance for isolated tornadoes in the area. Therefore, forecasts suggesting threatening winds and the potential for isolated tornadoes indicate the safest course of action is to close schools on Thursday August, 21st. Camden County Schools and all associated activities will be cancelled on Thursday, August 21st, 2008. School Officials will remain in regular contact with the National Weather Service and local public safety agencies during the next 24 hours to guide decisions about the storm’s influence on our school system and our ability to re-open on Friday. However, our fear is that the amount of rain predicted for our county in a relatively short period of time will make travel difficult for pupil transportation and families. Rainfall is expected to increase throughout the day tomorrow and may require the cancellation ofschool on Friday but that is not yet decided. Information will be provided through local media outlets regarding any further cancellations. Interested parties should monitor WKBX (KBay) radio station 106.3 for the most up to date information released by the school system or by visiting the school system’s internet website at www.camden.k12.ga.us. A determination about our ability to safely operate schools and pupil transportation on Friday, August 22nd, 2008, will be made during the day on August 21st, 2008. It’s important to remember that many rural areas in Camden County and neighborhoods within each city where school buses travel may become flooded and unsafe. Rather than endanger students who ride those buses, it may become necessary to suspend transportation temporarily. In the event pupil transportation must be suspended in some areas and families are unable to transport children to schools because they cannot leave their homes, excused absences will be granted.

In what private enterprise universe..

does a service organization increase its labor force by 53 percent in ANTICIPATION of a demand curve shift to the right, then compound the blunder by keeping the excess workers on when the shift fails to materialize? http://www.tribune-georgian.com/articles/2008/08/20/opinion/1opinion8.20.txt

Yes, I'll still be in District 4.

Thanks. My estimated closing date is not until December 1st. You mean in spite of my being able to stand at my new front door, fire a pistol (figuratively)and hit Mary Lee Clark Elementary, I'll be voting at the Union Hall? Weird. Jay Moreno ----- Original Message ----- From: KAY SCREWS To: 'Jay Moreno' Sent: Wednesday, August 20, 2008 8:14 AM Subject: RE: What district will my new address be in. Yes, you are correct , you will be in district 4 and you will be voting at the Union Hall, Downtown St. Marys. If you need a to put in a change of address, please keep in mind that all changes have to be made on or before Oct. 6th in order for them to be in effect for the November election. Please feel free to contact our office if we can help you in any way. Thank you . Sincerely, Kay Screws Chief Deputy Registrar Camden County From: Jay Moreno [mailto:jaymor@tds.net] Sent: Tuesday, August 19, 2008 1:27 PMTo: kscrews@co.camden.ga.usSubject: What district will my new address be in. Ms. Screws, I'm having a house built in Victoria Landing in St. Marys. My new adddress will be X01 Victoria's Circle. I'm virtually certain that that is in District 4, but could you confirm that for me? Thank you. Jay Moreno

Me thinks he did protest too much!

Remember the ostensibly privacy obsessed fellow who was so outraged when I repsonded to his challenge to name him on Topix that he had me banned? Yes, a virtual hermit. http://www.topix.com/forum/city/kingsland-ga/TMKPS0C655GUF64BN

Fay bears watching.

http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/082008/geo_320723250.shtml

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Well, whaddaya know!?

I have just confirmed that the dais in the new county commissioners' meeting chamber will be wheel chair accessible! And, oh, please, let it finally have a professional sound system!

Strapped St. Marys adopts some cuts; considers more.

http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/081908/geo_320175817.shtml One wonders if these cuts are intended to stand, or if council is floating a trial balloon to see if enough public hue and cry can be raised to give political cover for a modest millage increase. From TOPIX, Kingsland: sandy feller Saint Marys, GA Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #1 1 hr ago as I predicted floating the water and sewer bond issue is destroying us. by my calculations debt service is approximately 250,000. a month. because I do not have access to the city financial records this is only an estimate. I predicted the problem because I knew that gas prices would dry up splost money derived from I95 travelers and the down turn in housing starts would dry up fees. as an aside we would not be dependent on bldg start money if we had imposed impact fees in the proper manner. that is when site plan approvel is granted to new projects.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Not interested....

or just didn't notice? There have been over a hundred different individuals who have visited this blog today, but, so far as I can tell , no more than 3 or 4 have taken the time to respond to the demographic "polls" on the right hand border. Are you just not interested, or did you just not notice them? Thank you to those who have responded, of course. By the way, in the 1st, 3rd, 4th, and 5th "polls," you can -and should - give more than one response. 8/19 @2127 HRS: Earth, calling District 2. Earth, calling district 2. Anyone alive up there?

Thinking about gastric bypass surgery? Think again!!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26076054/ Sure made my 6-day-old Nutri-System diet a lot less odious!

Where, exactly, is District 4, you ask?

District 4: All of those tracts or parcels of land, either submerged or not submerged, comprising the Fourth Voter Commission and School Board District of Camden County, Georgia, lying and being in the 29th Georgia Military District of said Camden County and being more particularly described as follows: For a point of beginning commence at the centerline intersection of Georgia State Highway 40 Spur and Georgia State Highway 40 (Osborne Road) and proceed in a southeasterly direction along the centerline of said Georgia State Highway 40 to the point of intersection with the centerline of Point Peter Road (County Road 553); then proceed in a northerly direction along last mentioned centerline to the point of intersection with the centerline of the North River Causeway; thence proceed in generally an easterlydirection along last mentioned centerline to the easterly right-of-way line of New Point Peter Road; thence in a southerly direction along last mentioned easterly right-of-way line to the centerline of Palmetto Lane; thence in an easterly direction along last mentioned centerline to the centerline of Holly Drive; thence in a southerly direction along last mentioned centerline to the centerline of Cedar Lane; thence in a westerly direction along last mentioned centerline to the aforementioned easterly right-of-way line of New Point Peter Road; thence in a southerly direction along last mentioned easterly right-of-way line to the northerly line of Plantation Oaks; thence in an easterly, southerly then westerly direction around said Plantation Oaks back to the easterly right-of-way line of said New Point Peter Road; thence in a southerly direction along last mentioned easterly right-of-way line to the northerly line of lands now or formerly of William T. Walker; thence in an easterly, southerly then westerly direction around last mentioned lands back to the easterly right-of-way line of said New Point Peter Road; thence in a southerly direction along last mentioned easterly right-of-way line to the northerly line of Cypress Lake Development; thence in an easterly direction along last mentioned northerly line to the approximate center of the Cypress Lake Development; thence in a southerly direction through the Cypress Lake Development to its southerly boundary line on the northwesterly line of the Story Property;thence in a southwesterly direction then northwesterly direction along last mentioned northwesterly line to and along the northeasterly line of said Story Property to its intersection with the easterly bank of the North River; thence in generally a southerly direction along last mentioned easterly bank to its intersection with the centerline of the St. Marys River, said point being the Camden County, Georgia - Nassau County, Florida boundary line; thence proceed in a westerly direction along the meanderingsof the run of said St. Marys River to a point; thence in a northerly direction to the southwesterly end of the Shadowlawn Development, the same being the southerly edge of uplands of the Moeckel Estate; thence generally in a westerly then northerly direction along the uplands of the Moeckel Estate to its intersection with the centerline of Scrubby Bluff Creek; thence in generally a westerly direction along last mentioned centerline to its intersection with Millers Branch; thence in generally a northwesterly direction along last mentioned centerline to its intersection with the centerline of Osprey Drive, thence proceed in a southeasterly and northerly direction along last mentioned centerline to the point of intersection with the centerline of St. Marys Road; thence proceed in a northeasterly direction along last mentioned centerline to the point of intersection with the Georgia State Highway 40; thence proceed in a southeasterly direction along last mentioned centerline to the point of intersection with thecenterline of the St. Marys Railroad Spur to the Naval Submarine Base, Kings Bay, Georgia; thence proceed in a northerly direction along last mentioned centerline to the point of intersection with the centerline of Colerain to St. Marys Road; thence proceed in a northwesterly direction along last mentioned centerline to the point of intersection with the centerline of Kings Bay Road; thence proceed in a northeasterly direction along last mentioned centerline to the point of intersection with the centerlineof Georgia State Highway 40 Spur; thence proceed in a southerly direction along last mentioned centerline to the point of intersection with the centerline of Georgia State Highway 40 (Osborne Road) and the point of beginning of land described herein. Ya' got that?

In a wheel chair and looking for an apartment?

If so, I just thought that I would pass on that my 2 BR, 1 1/2 bath, +/- 950 sq. ft. apartment at Park Place will no doubt be available by March 1st, if not sooner. My lease expires on January 31st, but I'm sure they will strip out and replace all of the old carpet after painting the place. Here are the changes they made to it (Apt. 714, ground floor, on the lake) to accommodate me. There is a concrete wheelchair ramp at the front door. All interior doors, including the door to the MBR walk-in closet have been replaced with 36" doors. The stove has been replaced with a new one with the controls along the front edge. One non-load bearing short wall separating the bathroom from the adjoining laundry room has been removed to give me more wheel chair maneuvering room in the bathroom. There are both horizontal and vertical grab bars on the bathtub walls. There is a vertical grab bar next to the bathroom sink. The original bathroom vanity has been replaced with a pedestal sink you can roll up under. The galley kitchen is a little less than 5' wide, but you can get by. If you are interested, you probably should call them now and let them know. The office number is 673-7037. P.S., They mounted a mail box next to my front door for me. The post office will deliver to your door ( as opposed to the mail kiosk) if your'e disabled. I'll leave that for you.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Water taxi operator bows to St. Marys merchants' pressure...

drops plans to offer service directly from Fernandina to Cumberland Island. http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/081708/geo_319536907.shtml

Sunday Funnies; Volume 25

The husband leans over and asks his wife, 'Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.' Yes, she says, 'I remember it well.' OK,' he says, 'How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?' Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!' A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble. So he follows them. The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence. The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in.. Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground. The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know. After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on. The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself, this is truly amazing, I've got to ask them what their secret is. So, as the couple passes, he says to them,' Excuse me, but that was something else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?' Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply, 'Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence.'

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Mama mia! Tonight's the night!

Don't forget - tonight's the night for the authentic Italian dinner for Tommy Gregory at the VFW at 5:30 PM. Scroll down five posts for the original details. Update @ 1920 HRS. I just got back. When I left, the place was still packed and people were still eating. When I arrived at 1735 - 5 minutes after the designated starting time - there were hardly any parking spaces left on the VFW property, grass included. When I left, cars were parked on both sides of the road in front of the VFW hall for about a city block. There were no doubt more people at tonight's event than at all of Tommy's pre-primary events combined. If Mary Ann was out there writing down tag numbers, I don't think that any of tonight's crowd would have given a damn. The Italian food was delicioso! Those two paisans can cook! I wasn't too crazy about having to yell over the amped-up so-so singer-guitarist, but other than that, it was a really nice event.

Blog demographics.

Now that this blog is a week away from turning 6 months old and has just surpassed 50,000 hits, I thought it might be interesting (hopefully to you as well as me) to gain some insight into the demographics of the readers and contributors. I'm going to put together some questions, using the poll feature. It will probably take several different polls. Note that in some of the polls, you will be able to give answers to more than one question - or cast more than one "vote," if you will. By the way, I'm sure that all of you who are registered voters know what district you reside in. For those of you who do not or are not registered, here is a link to the map of the districts. http://www.co.camden.ga.us/index.asp?NID=133 See the menu in the top, left-hand corner. Thank you all in advance for your input. Addendum: Sunday, 08/17 @0714 HRS. Thanks to all who have responded so far. Can't wait to see the final results. I have a question: Up in the top poll - the one about what media you use to keep up with events in Camden - a couple of you have checked "other." Could you go to comments and tell us what other sources you use? Thanks. 1615 HRS: Hello, District 2. Anyone home up there?

Friday, August 15, 2008

Just happened to notice....

that the hit counter passed 50,000 today, in the 25th week of publication of this blog. Muchas gracias! Keep on spreading the word!

Well, let's see....

I was just assured by a Thuggie that if I were to run for the District 4 county commission seat, I would "not stand a snowball's chance in hell" and that it "would be great comedy." I think that a poll on my running may be just the ticket to get my hit numbers back up from their post-election slump. I'll have one up shortly.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Oh, by the way...

I signed a contract yesterday to have a house built in St. Marys. I hope to close on it in early December. I told y'all I was not going anywhere. Oh, what's that you ask? What district is it in? Why, it just happens to be in District 4. Addendum: 08/15 @1238 HRS. What a revoltin' development! Just 49 hours ago, I signed a contract to have a new house built. Now, in today's T&G, I read that the only thoroughfare to the subdivision will be closed for reconstruction in October for anywhere from 4 to 6 months! Brings to mind the old girlfriend who once famously observed, "Jay, if you had a pet duck, it would drown."

"Get-to-Gather" for Tommy Gregory this Saturday.

I just received the following e-mail from Jodi Gregory (and no, the Gregory campaign did not "pay" me to run this.) Hi everyone: Vinny from the Kingsland Police Department, and his cousin Rick, are holding a "Get to Gather" for Tommy this Saturday, August 16th, 5:30 PM at the VFW in Kingsland. The VFW is located behind Attorney Jim Stein's Office, which is behind the KIA dealership, on Hwy 40. Vinny and Rick are hosting this and providing some wonderful Italian food, which if any of you have ever any of Vinny or Rick cooking, you know what I'm talking about. It would be great to see you there if you can make it. I believe Vinny and Rick are charging $5.00 to help cover the costs. Thanks so much! Please pass this along. Jodi ---------------------------- Gregory For Sheriff P.O. Box 109 Waverly, GA 31565 (912) 576-3905 www.GregoryForSheriff.com ---------------------------- PAID FOR BY THE COMMITTEE TO ELECT TOMMY GREGORY SHERIFF I'll be there. Hope to see many of y'all.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

"College of Coastal Georgia" (formerly CGCC) transition to four-year institution continues apace.

http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/081208/geo_317402932.shtml

Sheriff-elect Gregory, Commisssioner Berry, et al, call for Big Lame Thug run-amok to resign now.

http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/081208/geo_317673855.shtml I, for one, certainly support the call for Smith to resign. However, we all know it is not in his sociopathic, megalomaniacal nature. I would hope that Berry, Zell, and Rhodes would vote to send an official request to the governor, from the CCBOC, to remove Smith immediately. Speaking of selling off the newer patrol cars, just last week, within a ten minute span, I saw three different, brand-new, black Crown Vic CCSO patrol cars. Were those purchased by the county, rather than from the drug money? I think so. 1120 HRS; Today's T&G News Update bears listening to: http://www.tribune-georgian.com/ Addendum, 8/13 @0851 HRS. http://www.news4jax.com/news4georgia/17171186/detail.html

Monday, August 11, 2008

Just curious....

Anonymus Nicholls, GA Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #11 28 min ago As for Chief Hatch,He is a great CHRISTIAN MAN with Great vaules and morals. If you don't know someone personally you should not be talking trash! Question: If he had performed his duties just exactly as he has so far, but as an agnostic or atheist with "Great values and morals," would the public not have been equally well served? You will no doubt recal that Bill Smith was oft touted as an upstanding "CHRISTIAN MAN" with a "heart as big as all outdoors." That would be the same Bill Smith who is now firing perceived "disloyal" employees.

Anyone know?

I just received this inquiry as a comment on another thread: "I know this is off topic "but" I would like for you to explain if you could what is going on. I have heard that the well connected business owners convinced the Commissioners to roll back their reassessments. Now instead of the 11.7 millage rate that has been advertised the taxpayers are going to have and increase of 11.85 mills. How can they continue to screw the little guy like this. I lease my space and I am not connected. So should I pay more than the Brandons or anyone else because of this." I must confess that I've not been following this closely enough to comment. Anyone? Update: 08/12 @ 1122HRS. Last night, the CCBOC voted to hold the millage increase to 11.7 over Mr. Howard's request for 11.85. This was done by forgoing requested additions to the contingency fund. That was the solution recommended by Commissioner Sears, the likely author of the above inquiry.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

The post-election, TOPIX cannonization of Chuckie Sears.

Butterbean Jacksonville, FL Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #71 23 min ago I bet Charlene asked to be on the list because she can't do what they want her to do. Shocks me that she is gonna leave but I give her props for getting out before it gets really bad up there and illegal stuff starts happening. I heard she was pretty shook up this week. Doing what's right hurts but it pays off in the long run. Anonymous Saint Marys, GA Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #72 21 min ago Butterbean wrote: I bet Charlene asked to be on the list because she can't do what they want her to do. Shocks me that she is gonna leave but I give her props for getting out before it gets really bad up there and illegal stuff starts happening. I heard she was pretty shook up this week. Doing what's right hurts but it pays off in the long run. It has been really bad up there for the past 3-4 years. Butterbean Jacksonville, FL Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #73 11 min ago Yeah I definitely know the bad side of that place. I was thinking about her when I heard about her leaving. She could have stayed until Jan and made good money then took the unemployment money for a while. I think she is doing the right thing. I heard she was trying to find another job before all this happened. I wish her luck. They should use the money from her job to keep someone they were gonna axe. This might have been part of her decision. eh? anonymous Kingsland, GA Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #74 10 min ago Butterbean wrote: I bet Charlene asked to be on the list because she can't do what they want her to do. Shocks me that she is gonna leave but I give her props for getting out before it gets really bad up there and illegal stuff starts happening. I heard she was pretty shook up this week. Doing what's right hurts but it pays off in the long run. Believe it or not she has done a good job of saving money. Rotor Rooter Join the community Saint Marys, GA 1 min ago Oh, please. Try to control your crush on Charlene. Let's not cannonize the little opportunistic twit! Uh, excuse me, but doesn't asking the sheriff to fire you so that you can draw unemployment and his agreeing to constitute insurance fraud on the part of both parties? Comments Showing posts 1 - 3 of 3 Anonymous Kingsland, GA Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #1 3 hrs ago Proof of a chopping list. Our informant did not tell us this came from the future sheriff. Anonymous Anonymous Proxy Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #2 55 min ago Tommy may not want her but I understand she has done very well at cutting cost in the food dept. What I heard were specifics of how and it show a dedicated worker. Many think she is an airhead. She is not. But, she is quiet. Rotor Rooter Saint Marys, GA Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #3 39 min ago So, she stopped buying her campaign eats from the jail's food budget? No more steaks, quiche, key lime cheesecake, grouper fingers? Damn, that was innovative!

Is BLT running amok on vindictive, firing rampage?

I don't know - yet - if it's true, but it has gotten a lot of play in the last 14 hours on TOPIX. http://www.topix.com/forum/city/kingsland-ga/T1ORNJIJKM0JROQ4L I look forward to getting the facts from a couple of sources later today or tomorrow. Update @ 1240 HRS. I just heard from one of my reliable sources (other than Main Mole). It would appear that a CCSO couple, Mark and Lucretia Dyals, were, indeed, fired Friday,a s first reported on TOPIX. Moreover, there is a list of another 14 or so to be fired this coming week. At some point this past week (Friday, I think) BLT (Big Lame Thug) showed up at the sub station on Highway 40. He reportedly called all of the employees present together for an impromptu meeting at which he angrily informed them that in light of their disloyalty to him - as supposedly made obvious by his defeat - he no longer felt any responsibility to the office of sheriff per se nor to them in particular. He announced that there would be more firings and, more or less, "hell-to-pay" between now and January 1. Hello - FEDS! Where the hell are you?

Sunday Funnies; Volume 24

Murphy's Other 15 Laws 1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. 2. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. 3. He, who laughs last, thinks slowest. 4. A day without sunshine is like, well, night. 5. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. 6. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. 7. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. 8. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. 9. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them. 10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. 11. The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first. 12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. 13. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries. 14. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in the dark. 15. When you go into court, you are putting yourself into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Pardon me, Thuggie ass...

but why in the world would the new sheriff patrol the incorporated areas of St. Marys and Kingsland? Beaker Berlin, Germany Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #30 2 hrs ago Will the New sheriff support St Marys. Kingsland and Woodbine? Will the new sheriff patrol these areas? Will the new Sheriff cause any of these cities to spend money for services that are currently covered by the Sheriff's Office? Now, granted, the CCSO has a contract to cover Woodbine, after Woodbine closed down their own police department. I'm sure that will continue until there is sufficient development in Woodbine to afford their own again. Are you asking if Tommy will use some of the "excess" confiscated rug money to buy cars, radios, etc. for the municipal police forces. I don't know for sure, but I would imagine that after taking care of the CCSO, there might be funds to do that and he may well continue to do it. I would consider - and the law would consider - that a legitimate expenditure. I, for one, would not see that as the kind of vote buying that Smith did. Could you enumerate for us what services within the city limits of St. Marys and Kingsland, respectively, are currently covered by the sheriff's office?

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Main Mole checks in..

Earlier today, on my review of Peppers, this exchange took place in the comments section: Anonymous said... jay you should get on the horn with your mole, so I am hearing the dismantling of the S O has begun with cars being stripped away from key personnel, and 2 week unpaid leaves being promised to all employees. August 5, 2008 6:45 PM Jay Moreno said... My mole contacts me. I have no idea who he/she is - much less how to contact them.How about it - Main Mole? What's shakin' at the CCSO? Well, Main Mole read that and called me about 9:00 PM. It turns out that BLT (Big Lame Thug) has been sticking pretty close to Camden since his defeat to better facilitate showing his vindictive, angry ass. He's cussed out Jim Proctor for not supporting him. He's called Kingsland Chief of Police Darryl Griffis and put such a cussin' on him for allowing Gregory time off to campaign that Griffis finally had to hang up on him. He's reportedly, as of a meeting yesterday, making up a list of non-patrol personnel he suspects of being less than enthusiastic supporters of his failed campaign. They will soon be "punished" by having "their" county cars taken away. Oh, and when another of those three pay period months comes up (October, I think) , ALL personnel will be required to take two weeks unpaid leave as group punishment. MM says he'll let me know just as soon as cars are actually yanked and who from. Oh, Feds - it's high damned time! Where's that indictment????

Review of "Peppers" Mexican Grill and Cantina.

Well, this afternoon, I had a raging case the hungries for some tasty and meaty chow. Diabetes be damned for one meal. I went and tried Peppers, over where Sin Far Chinese used to be. I had heard nothing but good things about the place. Turns out they were right. I arrived at the door at 4:49 PM. Within one minute of my coming in the door, the manager had cleared two chairs from a table to accommodate my wheelchair. He immediately took my order for iced tea which arrived at the two point five minute mark. Menu at no more than three minutes, followed by fresh, hot chips and a good salsa at maybe 3.25 minutes. Order taken at minute 5; entree on table 10 minutes after arrival. I ordered the 3 chimichanga dinner. That's what I used to get all the time down at El Potros. There, I always remembered to specify FRIED chimichangas. Today, I forgot to. What I got were three soft chimichangas; one beef, one pork, and one jumbo shrimp. They were served with red Mexican rice with a bit of yellow corn mixed in, and good re fried beans. The chimichangas were drenched in a good melted queso (whitish Mexican cheese.) That turned out to be a fortuitous oversight on my part. The soft ones are really good! The beef, pork and shrimp had all been marinated in three quite different marinades, then each was enclosed in its own large, soft tortilla that had been browned on the grill, but was still soft enough to wrap into something the size of a small calzone. The shrimp was charred on the grill before being wrapped up. All three were quite delicious, as were the rice and re fried beans. Unlike most places, there was no shredded lettuce, no sour cream, and no guacamole. I'm sure you could get those if you asked. I usually find them a nuisance on platters. Surprisingly - for a non-American Southern restaurant - the iced tea was strong and good. The chips and salsa were excellent. WARNING: Do not do as I did and succumb to the temptation to try "just a little bit" of any of the three different bottles of Gringocidal habanero sauces on your table. I added maybe 1/8th of a teaspoon of the supposed least hot sauce to my whole bowl of salsa. Whoa, mama. A whole teaspoon might have killed me. The prices are moderate. You can get an entree and tea for around $10 - $11.00 total. My bill, for one of the heartier dishes, came to $13.00 and some change. All-in-all, a very satisfactory dining experience. Try it - I think you'll like it! Update @0955 HRS. on 8/6. It's now over 16 hours after my dining experience at Peppers. I'm happy to report that I slept soundly with absolutely no adverse gastroenterological effects from the food whatsoever.

District 1 voters....

Did you remember to vote today? Check back about 7:15 or so. I should have the results published by then. Uh oh! Just discovered this message: Status Tuesday, August 05, 2008 Blogger will be unavailable Tuesday (8/5) at 4:00PM PDT for about 10 minutes for maintenance. Posted by Jessica at 10:39 PDT That is, of course 7:00 PM, our time. Hopefully, that will not delay my bringing you the results. 7:25 PM. No results yet. Awaiting call from Shirley Wise at Judge Gillette's office. 7:50 Incredibly, they do not yet have all of the results from all of the precincts. But here's what they do have so far on the District 1 county commission race: Keene, 451 King, 174 I'm gonna go out on a limb (though not very far) and declare Keene the winner. Shirley Wise is going to call me with the finals when they get them. 8:05 PM: Congratulations, Chip Keene - and best of luck in November!

Shirley Wise just called. The numbers remain Keene, 451; King, 174. The numbers may change slightly tomorrow. There are a handful of "provisional" votes (people who showed up and were shocked to find that they were not registered - or at least not on the rolls at the polls.) They were allowed to vote "provisionally", subject to their status being checked out more thoroughly at the regsistrar's office tomorrow.

Thank you, Shirley Wise.

Update: 08/06 @ 1001 HRS.

Rebel Dawg Jacksonville, FL Reply » Report Abuse Judge it! #3 44 min ago Keene, 451King, 174Shirley Wise just called. The numbers remain Keene, 451; King, 174. The numbers may change slightly tomorrow. There are a handful of "provisional" votes (people who showed up and were shocked to find that they were not registered - or at least not on the rolls at the polls.) They were allowed to vote "provisionally", subject to their status being checked out more thoroughly at the registrar's office tomorrow. Thank you, Shirley Wise.

Uh, "Rebel Dawg," if you are going to cut and paste my reportage verbatim onto TOPIX Kingsland (a marked improvement, no doubt) would you mind giving attribution? That means acknowledging where it came from - preferably by posting a link to my website. Thank you.

Special to the colonoscopy obsessed on Topix.

I called Dr. Varges office yesterday for my colonoscopy report. Essentially negative, i.e., no polyps, benign or otherwise. A mild case of diverticulitis was noted. Whatever is going to do me in 20 years or so from now, it apparently will not be colon cancer.

Sea Island Company cans hundreds of employees.

http://www.jacksonville.com/tu-online/stories/080508/geo_313468261.shtml

Monday, August 4, 2008

Where in the world is Willie?

Well, it's been three weeks since the election. Have there been any reliable BLT (Big Lame Thug) sightings in Camden County since then?

District 1 voters....

Don't forget to vote tomorrow in the Republican run off for the Republican candidate for District 1 County Commissioner. Any registered voter residing in District 1 is eligible to vote EXCEPT anyone who voted as a Democrat in the July 15th primary. For what it's worth, if I lived in District 1, I would be voting for Mr. Keene tomorrow and in November.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

15 years and counting.

Today marks the 14th anniversary of my arrival in St. Marys on August 3rd, 1993. All those invitations to leave - and even one offer of a bus ticket - notwithstanding, I plan on sticking around for another 25 or so.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Sunday Funnies, Volume 23

Thanks to the reader who e-mailed me this Dave Barry piece on colonoscopies. Unfortunately, discretion requires that he/she remain anonymous until Sheriff Gregory is actually sworn in. Dave Barry's Colonoscopy Journal: I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy. A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis. Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner. I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, quote, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!' I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescripti on for a product called MoviPrep, which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America's enemies. I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordancewith my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor. Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, and then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For thoseunfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons.) Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and hereI am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon. The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose watery bowel movement may result.' This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground. MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but: Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seatbelt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet. After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep. The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I WA S very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologizeto a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough. At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked. Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep. At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought ofthis, but then I pondered what would happen if you got your self too tipsyto make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire HoseMode. You would have no choice but to burn your house. When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point. Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand. There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by Abba. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' has to be the least appropriate. 'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me. 'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepareyourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it waslike. I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, Abba was shrieking 'Dancing Queen! Feel the beat from the tambourine' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood. Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that it was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ. ( I would say "Cheers", but somehow the expression "Up Yours" had a more appropriate ring to it.) Hope you liked the article.